Continuing our study of Proverbs, Tyler Jones speaks on the issue of Parenting children.
Proverbs 22:15 folly is bound up in the heart of a child…
every child’s temperament is wired in 1 of 3 ways: 1. anxiety 2. aggression 3. hope
Jerome Kagan says: The worst thing that you can do for your child is to let your child be themselves (modern parenting—let the child be themselves, let them find their own way). Unless a parent intervenes, the child’s natural temperament will dominate them and they will not learn to act wise in situations where their habitual temperament response is inappropriate or even harmful. Good parents will see the dark side of their child's temperament and will intervene, showing them a need to have greater range of responses. Good parents will teach the anxious to be bold, the bold to be anxious, the pessimist to have hope and the chronically sunny to worry a little.
Genesis 8:21 never again will I curse the ground because of man, even though every inclination of his heart is evil from childhood.
Deut 6:4-7 Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.
Tim Keller says: formation happens in a covenant community between a parent and a child, not a consumer relationship.
Hebrews 12:7-8 endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. for what son is not disciplined by his father? if you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons.
Proverbs 23:13-14 do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish him with the rod, he will not die. punish him with the rod and save his soul from death.
Proverbs 22:6 train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.
Reflection: 1. The Father knew there would be brokenness in the world but He did not intend it. Many of us have been wounded and crushed by our parents. The Father wants to bring healing into your life. Healing will be a process, it will take time but God will renew you. Will you humble yourself and come to the Father?
Love precedes obedience—this has been perfectly illustrated by God as He loves us and sent His Son for us. Our ability to follow Him and obey Him resides entirely in His love. Christ teaches us that we are loved and therefore we can follow Him in joy. In your parenting, love must precede rules and demands for godliness. Does your child know God’s love and your love?
We can debate many parenting tactics and strategies but scripture is clear that we are to direct and instruct our children. Our main instructive method is to live a godly life and allow our children to see it. Are you a man /woman of God and are you allowing your children to watch you? What will it take for you to follow Christ with your whole life in-front of your children?